“So have you started with daycare yet?” asks a fellow mom at the toddler gymnastics class
“Not really, we have decided to try homeschooling”
***
When someone like myself (living in one of the most developed metropolitan cities in the world in a country that ranks 3rd in global ranks for education) chooses to homeschool her children it makes for a lot of polite eyebrow-raising and often followed by uncomfortable questions. I am usually faced with legitimate concerns, curiosity, and comments fostered primarily by justifications for their own choice of standard school system.
So here are some of the main reasons why we chose to home-school, hopefully, it will clear the air for some and provide some insight and useful information for those who are considering embarking on this journey as well.
Better education
There are many reasons packed under this topic so allow me to indulge you in a brief rundown of the main ideas that trouble us about our current education system.
Class Size
After the latest educational policy changes, we are now looking at up to 28 kids from kindergarten to 3rd grade (if the class is given a teaching assistant as well) and up to 38 for grades 4-5. The latest cuts did not exactly make things better. At this point, I am afraid that teachers can no longer do the thing they were trained and hired to do. I am afraid that we have now tossed them in this ridiculous situation where their main daily priority is to make sure the day proceeds with as little disruptions as possible, often costing them their patience, (in many instances their dignity) and causing them emotional and psychological exhaustion.
There just isn’t sufficient time for the teacher to be able to spend necessary personal time with each student, make a detailed and thorough evaluation, outline their strengths, weaknesses and devise strategies to help them work through that. Which leads me to the next point…
Unicorn Teachers
These are teachers who have incredible emotional maturity and psychological understanding. They can apply the correct approach to every hard situation, have outside of the box thinking and focus on the developmental progress of every single student. I have met them, they do exist but statistically speaking you have to get pretty lucky to continuously have one year after year. And going a full year with a teacher whose values do not align with yours or who is exhausted and unable to provide each class with the correct approach, patience, analytical attributes, psychological maturity, kindness and understanding toward each situation and student is a year too many in my opinion. A lot happens in the development of a young child each year and without optimal stimulation, engagement, and strong understanding for their personality and developmental progress the trust bond might be severed or never established. And frankly this, in my opinion, is a gamble I’d rather not take.
Inflexible Currículum
With the curriculum being structured around preset ideas of what should be covered in each grade for each subject I find that individuality in learning, ability, and interests tend to be somewhat neglected. Students are expected to internalize all material in a generic, cookie-cutter way. Occasionally advanced students are paired up into a gifted program but that has the potential to create other problems in my opinion.
The flexibility to explore one topic in whichever manner would benefit the student with greater efficacy falls again on the shoulders of a teacher. A talented highly empathetic and emotionally intelligent teacher might recognize the subjects each one of their students should navigate toward. They would also have the ability to present each topic in different ways to guarantee complete understanding. This, however, is almost impossible to be achieved in a 35 student classroom.
Outdated Curriculum
In my opinion, we are way overdue for a major revamping of our current curriculum. It’s outdated, the subjects are boring and in many ways irrelevant (and if they are not now, they certainly will be as we advance in this boom of technological age). Instilling creativity, analytical thought and maintaining curiosity through stimulating activities once again falls on the teacher.
Tests and measures of intelligence
What we know now about the multitude of different forms of intelligence compared to say 20 years ago is alone worth revamping the way we test and mark our children in school. Their intelligence is attached to a number which usually indicates their proficiency in one or a few specific styles of learning. This might work for some kids but not for others and as a result, the ones with lower marks are left with unsettling fear that they are just not smart or good enough. As a result, that leads to all kinds of behaviours and reactions that can harm their curiosity and will to learn. It often results in those kids becoming the ones to first jump on the opportunity to disrupt the class, thus impacting the rest of the kids.
Negative peer influences
We make a decent effort to limit TV, screen time and cartoon exposure. (My daughter was not allowed any screen time aside for the casual face time with grandparents until she turned 2.5 and even then it was only very occasional and mostly art or sport-related: dancing, live concert videos, surfing, snowboarding, etc. We spend a lot of time reasoning and talking about kindness, respect, determination, grit, values we feel very strongly about. We have also navigated her upbringing to challenge social expectations, for example, gender stereotypes (we try to stick to gender-neutral clothes and toys).
The problem is that when children encounter a few classmates who do not have similar ideas, rebel, act silly, do not listen, or who hold beliefs of what girls should dress like or play with will without a doubt have its effects on them. And even though I believe that every situation could be turned into a learning ground, I will certainly not be there for many of those subtle social transformations. Thus, I would much rather prefer to stick to media free, gender-neutral, upbringing as much as possible until she is old enough to understand the benefits and consequences.
Bullying:
I was bullied as a kid, from kindergarten to grade 8 (until I switched schools). I was lucky to have never been physically abused (came close once in grade 1 but was saved by a kind stranger who just happened to pass by at that same time). I fully understand the impact innocent “children remarks” can have on a child’s understanding of themselves and specifically their self-worth and confidence, not to mention the severe humbling effect intelligent kids can be subjected to, to avoid bringing attention to themselves.
I now realize that I was a lucky victim as there was no way for the kids to continue their abuse at home. Today the kids are not this lucky. They carry their bullies everywhere they go, all they need to do is look at social media on their devices.
According to the latest statistics: “at least 1 in 3 adolescent students in Canada have reported being bullied recently.
Let that sit in for a minute…
Cumulative knowledge
Both my partner and I can handle the current curriculum course load plus additional learning material needed for each school grade. Between the two of us, we have a strong academic, creative and analytical background that can lay ground to fruitful learning.
We are extremely interested in the latest research in education, psychology, economics, etc. and we try to keep an open mind, read about all the latest research in these fields.
Flexible schedule
As self-employed we both can shift our schedule to help incorporate and navigate through any specific learning demands we need to tackle. Our flexibility allows us to take each day as it comes and restructure schedules when necessary. Moreover, we have the time to take her to multiple classes and provide her with her a wide range of activities.
Strong Homeschooling Community
Last but certainly not least, we have a strong community for homeschoolers. From Facebook groups to homeschooling classes offered in parks and various facilities it is becoming increasingly easy to meet people, schedule playdates, and create similar circles of influence as do school groups.
Besides, we also live in a city that offers an abundance of wonderful classes and activities for every age group via affordable classes through the city’s website or small businesses. With enough research, one can easily plan a well structured educational and social program for their children.
Finally, with that being said, we are taking on a very objective and humbled position as we decided to embark on this new adventure. We are by no means set on this idea and will be willing to consider other options if we believe that our child is not getting whatever is needed from her homeschooling activities. As of now, we are extremely happy with our choice and the ability to spend so much valuable time with our little one.
The Tardigrade Mom 